Toasting - Joining The Group

Anyone who has entertained or been entertained in China has come across the toasting ritual.

Toasting in China is a way to create and receive "face" from friends and colleagues. By toasting your friend or colleague you are asking them to partake "first" which allows you to then drink your beverage of choice. Rarely do people sitting around a banquet table drink beer or wine "by themselves." It is more appropriate to drink in pairs or in groups than by yourself. Solo drinking is viewed as selfish and impolite.

At a banquet table the host always sits in the seat facing the door. The most important guests sit to his/her left and right. The host must wait for the banquet's choice of beverage to be poured for all guests before he/she raises their glass in a "group" toast which signifies the meal has begun.

Once the meal is underway the other guests will toast the host to show their appreciation. This is a direct toast with the host. Each person at the table should toast the host beginning with the most senior guest and continuing until everyone has completed toasting the host.

Then everyone is free to toast the host's friends and colleagues. Usually the guests do not toast each other unless they are meeting for the first time. If they do toast each other it is done at the end of the meal or done discretely.

Usually the waiter or waitress keeps the glasses full during the meal - usually small glasses. This is important in order to always have the opportunity to toast someone in case you yourself want to take a drink !

It is important never to be "cheap" with liquor at an important dinner in order to make sure everyone is enjoying themselves. One does not have to drink excessively but one needs to participate in the process.

Depending on who the host is determines how much one must drink each time. If the host is a good drinker then both parties usually drain their glasses on each toast. Women are usually exempted from this requirement if they declare up front that they are not "real drinkers."

The meal is usually closed by the host raising his/her glass to everyone as a group and draining the remaining wine or liquor so as not to leave anything to waste.

Regardless of one's ability to drink it is important to participate in this ritual so as to be brought into the "group" and make friends.

Good luck !